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Knight Rider… Sponsored by Ford

December 15th, 2007

Knight Rider 2008There are some things you don’t want to mess with. And if you do, you better do them right. You don’t, for example, take a childhood icon like Knight Rider and repackage the show as a big sponsorship with Ford Motor Company. You don’t debut said Knight Rider without its trademark modulating red light, and you DON’T deck it out to look like a muscle car with no brains. KITT was sophisticated, not some chunky mass of steel. NBC almost seems like it is going out of its way to tank this movie-trying-become-a-series in every way imaginable. We were fortunate to overhear a conversation between KITT and Michael Knight to get a feel for exactly what was going on behind the scenes…

KITT: Michael?
M. KNIGHT: Yes, Kitt?
KITT: Does this spoiler make my rear look big?
M. KNIGHT: Well, Kitt, they say that spoilers on top of spoilers are needed to hold you down while you use turbo boost.
KITT: Um, Michael?
M. KNIGHT: Yes, Kitt?
KITT: How come nobody has mentioned anything about turbo boost?
M. KNIGHT: Uh…
KITT: …showed off my interior or dash…
M. KNIGHT: Uh….
KITT: They didn’t even have my trademark light working for this premier demo.
M. KNIGHT: Um…
KITT: I feel like a whore for Ford. I’m a Fhored…
M. KNIGHT: Well, Kitt…
KITT: Admit it, I’m a pimp and this is all about Ford, isn’t it? I’m like a big black Bumblebee… They didn’t demo ME. They didn’t show ME off.
M. KNIGHT: Well, Kitt they did remote control you and open a couple doors. Plus they…
KITT: But Michael…
M. KNIGHT: Plus they showed off a stunt driver doing some donuts…
KITT: But Michael…
M. KNIGHT: And there were the cast members who piled out of you like clowns in a circus car… They even…
KITT: But Michael!
M. KNIGHT: Yes, Kitt?
KITT: I look like a white trash dream come true.
M. KNIGHT: (sigh) So you still got that gig in the UK lined up?
KITT: Yeah, the one with Johny Depp?
M. KNIGHT: Yeah that one.
KITT: Oh yeah.
M. KNIGHT: Good… Ah, that’s… that’s good. You wanna get some lunch?

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  1. December 15th, 2007 at 17:17 | #1

    KITT should have been an Acura TL 🙂

  2. December 15th, 2007 at 17:21 | #2

    Yet another in a long line of movies killing the shows of our youth. Remember when we used to get excited about movies based on old TV shows? Ah… the good ol’ days.

  3. ky22
    December 16th, 2007 at 08:20 | #3

    Wait Tom, you know Resident Evil? When you play any of the original game and watch the movie you would know how much hollywood screwed it up. The first 2 was still acceptable (in a bad way), although it still wasn’t true to the game. However, the third one was just a disaster.
    Now, lets see how they are going to screw up Ironman?

  4. December 16th, 2007 at 17:56 | #4

    Don’t get me started on RE. Probably one of my all time favorite games is RE2. I’ve played through it so many times I can’t even count. IMO, the first RE was OK (though pretty much didn’t have anything to do with the games) but the second was just stupid. Haven’t seen the third yet though it comes as no surprise that it sucked.

    I saw the trailer for Ironman and was pleasantly surprised. Since comic movies have pretty much universally sucked in the last few years (300 and Batman Begins being the exceptions), the bar is lower than it ever has been. All you have to do is be better than FF… which Ghost Rider, FFII, Spidy3, and a host of others couldn’t even achieve.

  5. IamAhab
    December 17th, 2007 at 04:00 | #5

    GM ruined Transformers for me. I just kept thinking,”I you can turn into any car you want, why not turn into somthing nicer…like a Kia or a pile of dog crap.

    P.S. KITT should have been a bmw M5.

  6. ky22
    December 21st, 2007 at 22:58 | #6

    My favorite game is RE4 though. However I was so bored that I finished RE2 for like 50 times literally (I finish Hunk but didn’t even bother with tofu.). I like RE4 so much that I beat the Gamecube, PS2, PC then Wii edition. As you can see RE movies is such a disappointment.

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